I’m mad. Not like, fiery, furious mad. But just really frustrated. There is a rebellion in my soul right now. The kind where I absolutely cannot make myself work. See? It’s 3:44pm right now on a Monday. I spent half of my Sunday the weekend before last working until 10pm. Which is fine. I wasn’t too upset about it – except for the fact that it was in Nashville and I had my last night with my best friend planned – but had to work. Luckily, she’s one of the bravest souls I know and has a deep comfort with exploring new towns (and cities… shit, and countries too!) on her own I have to admit – I do not have that level of curiosity and adventure. And she had a great time. And because I had a 7am call the next morning, I had…
So many things to be grateful for. And I am. I don’t want to sound like a brat…. But I do, and it seems like I am ungrateful. That couldn’t be further from the truth. I am in a job – the box. Been at this job for a long while lately. Sure, it’s hard. Sure, it’s challenging and it feels some days like a false sense of reality, working to fulfill insignificant goals. A place that I use to pave the way to afford the things I want, need, and love. And that is the truth. But I am so grateful. I have been tossing around and testing a truth that I think I have discovered: that “For something to be true, you have to see it from both sides.” I truly feel that is a place where…
Ok, so an update to the last post, I was offered that job. And yes, that’s right – I took the job. I was officially working again for another company. The very one, indeed, headliner of the wrestle in my previous post. When I had been at it just barely over a month, it was too soon to really know how it was going to work out. I mean, I thought I would eventually really enjoy it. However, in the first 3 months of “drinking from the fire hose” season, it felt stressful and overwhelming during the learning phase. I was particularly perturbed at the level of responsibility I already had with no official training; however, this complaint was just me being exhausted from my last position that entailed a much higher level of the same. Smaller companies tend to not have great training programs built…
I’ve been there before. That place “In Between.” Different scenarios, of course have this identification, but I’m referring to that in-between place of my career and living in this almost “no mans land.” It took me around a year – actually a little over a year – before I found my next path on the first go-round. It was challenging. It was demoralizing. It was hard. However, that next time (with the grope) was different, in that I had it kind of happen to me, rather than a choice I made to get me there. However, that wasn’t my first rodeo folks. The first time I chose it. I chose to branch off, and create that kind of career that I believed would propel me into my own business, and would kick-off my new found life –…